February 26, 2007
PPP discovers PR23 blog gene
Controversy has surrounded PayPerPost since its inception. Does marketing through blogs sully the blogsphere? Are eight mentions of sponsorship per post enough to satisfy the A-list bloggers’ demands, or must we now meet their new requirement for a nice round ten? Certain big names have been slinging mud, claiming to be defending purity (much like a notorious committee from the 1950s that was eventually debunked for its witch-hunting ways.) PPP has risen above it all and created a solid market based on its ability to provide effective online advertising.
Now that that’s settled the naysayers have turned to other means of attack against the premier service for providing internet exposure through blogs. A quick check of google this morning shows no less than 992,355 links to “PPP rumors.” What’s going on? It all originated with Ted Murphy’s recent hush-hush trip to England. While the trip itself was well-publicized, much of Mr. Murphy’s time remained unaccounted for. The dearth of verifiable information has sparked the imaginations of the masses and served as grist for the rumor mills.
The truth may now be told and you’re hearing here first. Since the early days of Al Gore’s internet there has been a push to discover the pinnacle of of perfection, a formula for the PR ten marketing vehicle. Advertisers in search of broad exposure have spent years and many dollars towards this end, to no avail. Big-name critics have averred that THE TEN is a mere pipedream, no more attainable than the gold at the end of the rainbow. Mr. Murphy was publicly ridiculed for his assertion that THE TEN was within reach through blogging. Blogs were proclaimed to be the “mom and pop shop” of the internet, doomed to fail as marketing tools. Hah! The world should have paid attention, but chose to ignore the Voice of Ted.
Everyone who hasn’t been living under a rock knows that blogs, much like the human body, are made of of certain elements which can be mapped and their combinations identified. With The Human Genome Project as a model, Mr. Murphy financed research that has been geared towards creating a formula to discover and replicate the identity of THE PERFECT TEN. During his recent trip abroad he not only confirmed that the formula has been finalized, but also found that, during the course of research, it was accidentally discovered that the configuration of THE PERFECT TEN could be expanded and stimulated into spontaneous growth. A certain statistician, whose identity has been protected, chanced upon the BGF (blog growth factor) when, overstimulated by numerical input and bad coffee, she transposed two figures in the basic formula. The result was an astounding PR 23 blog! Being anxious to communicate the nature of this discovery to his fellows while maintaining the confidentiality of his source, Mr. Murphy disguised the information in a seemingly innocuous blog post about blood sausage. Shortly after that it was noted that the hapless statistician was accidentally lobotomized during what was supposed to be a minor cosmetic surgical procedure, leaving Mr. Murphy as the sole possessor of the secret.
Application of BGF has been tested on a few select blogs and the formula perfected. The application will be extended to all blogs registered with PPP in the coming weeks. Because of the proprietary nature of the formula, competitive bidding will rule the marketplace as advertisers flock to the one true source of guaranteed internet exposure for their concepts. You may call this a rumor if you choose, but everything contained herein can be verified. I know because I have a sworn statement from my neighbor’s cousin’s step-brothers employer, who dates the sister-in-law of the janitor who absconded with the only known copy of Mr. Murphy’s journal.
Let the bidding begin.
Technorati Tags: payperpost, rumors, humor, blogging
Posted by skeet @ 10:11 am • Business, PayPerPost
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February 26th, 2007 at 1:03 pm, Shadowscope Says:
Alexa Project…
Updated 2/20/07 - Someone asked me to add a couple of links to my list. Updated again - There’s a new link to try. Load up http://www.personalinjuryblog.info/, it opens all 100 sites in an iframe. Uses a lot of……
February 26th, 2007 at 9:08 pm, Ann Says:
What a load of…no wait. Great theory!! Thanks for clearing it all up. LOL
February 27th, 2007 at 1:08 pm, Tricia Says:
LOL Great idea! If only!
March 24th, 2007 at 7:39 am, Dustin Says:
I think people who are slinging mud are doing so out of either ignorance or fear. The so called “A-Listers” are nothing special. BoingBoing has got to be one of the crappiest blogs I’ve ever seen. It’s archaic in layout and the blog posts are a constant regurgitation of whatever else is in the news today. They smother their blog in ads. SMOTHER.
I don’t hear anyone complaining when a radio DJ gives props to a local jewelry store, but we all know he’s paid to do it. So what’s the big deal with bloggers doing the same thing? A bloggers gotta eat!